🌱 Language shapes our internal experience
The language we hear — and the language we use about ourselves — plays a powerful role in how we experience stress, emotions, and challenges.
Research in psychology and education shows that self-talk can influence emotional regulation and self-concept. “I am” statements are particularly impactful because they link language directly to identity, not just behaviour.
Rather than focusing on what someone should do, affirmations support how someone feels in the moment.
Examples might include:
• I am safe.
• I am allowed to take my time.
• I can ask for help.
💬 Affirmations aren’t about pretending everything is fine
A common concern is that affirmations ask people to ignore real feelings. In reality, affirmations work best when they are:
• realistic
• simple
• emotionally safe
• relevant to the moment
For example, “I am calm” may feel untrue during distress, whereas “I can take a breath” or “This feeling will pass” may feel more accessible and regulating.
Neuroaffirming practice values honesty over positivity.
🌿 Supporting emotional regulation
Emotional regulation develops over time and is closely linked to a person’s sense of safety and predictability.
Research suggests that familiar, repeated language can help reduce emotional load during stressful situations. When affirmations are known and easily accessible, they can act as verbal anchors, supporting self-soothing and recovery.
In everyday life, this might look like:
• reading an affirmation before a transition
• using a familiar phrase during frustration
• revisiting affirmations during calm moments so they’re available when needed
🌼 Choice and ownership matter
Like all supports, affirmations are most effective when the person using them has choice and ownership over the language.
Some people prefer affirmations that focus on strength. Others prefer neutral, practical reminders. There is no single right set — what matters is that the words feel respectful and meaningful.
🌱 Small words, meaningful impact
Affirmations don’t need to be long or complex to be effective. Often, the simplest phrases are the most grounding.
Used thoughtfully, “I am” affirmations can support emotional regulation, confidence, self-advocacy, and a kinder internal dialogue.
📚 References & Further Reading
- American Psychological Association (APA). Self-affirmation theory.
https://dictionary.apa.org/self-affirmation
• Haimovitz, K., & Dweck, C. (2017). What Predicts Children’s Fixed and Growth Mindsets?
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0956797617739704
• Raising Children Network. Helping children manage emotions.
https://raisingchildren.net.au/behaviour/emotions/understanding-feelings/helping-children-manage-emotions
• Occupational Therapy Australia. Supporting emotional regulation.
https://otaus.com.au/publicassets/8c4f4b4e-5d6b-eb11-a813-000d3ad2e7c8/self-regulation.pdf