🌱 The nervous system comes first
The brain is wired to prioritise safety. When the nervous system senses stress, uncertainty, or threat, energy shifts away from thinking, problem-solving, and learning, and towards survival responses.
Research in neuroscience and education shows that when a person is in a heightened state, access to executive functioning, memory, and language is reduced. In simple terms, learning can’t happen until the nervous system feels safe.
🧠 What regulation really means
Regulation is often misunderstood as being calm, quiet, or compliant. In reality, regulation looks different for everyone.
Being regulated means a person can:
• engage with what’s happening
• process information
• communicate needs
• respond flexibly to challenges
For some people, regulation involves stillness. For others, it involves movement, sensory input, or connection. There is no single “right” way to regulate.
🌿 Behaviour is communication
Neuroaffirming practice recognises behaviour as a form of communication.
When someone is dysregulated, their behaviour may be communicating:
• overwhelm
• uncertainty
• sensory overload
• fatigue
• unmet needs
Responding with support rather than correction helps restore regulation and builds trust.
🌼 Supporting regulation in everyday moments
Regulation is often supported through simple, proactive strategies:
• predictable routines
• visual supports
• access to movement or sensory tools
• calm, consistent language
• trusted relationships
These supports don’t lower expectations. They create access to learning, independence, and participation.
🌱 Regulation grows with support, not pressure
Research shows that regulation skills develop through co-regulation — experiencing calm, supportive responses from others — before becoming internalised over time.
When we prioritise regulation first, we reduce stress and increase capacity. Learning, communication, and independence naturally follow when the nervous system is ready.
Regulation is not a reward.
It is a prerequisite.
📚 References & Further Reading
- Center on the Developing Child, Harvard University. Executive Function & Self-Regulation.
https://developingchild.harvard.edu/science/key-concepts/executive-function/
• Porges, S. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3108032/
• National Child Traumatic Stress Network. Understanding stress responses.
https://www.nctsn.org/what-is-child-traumatic-stress
• Occupational Therapy Australia. Supporting self-regulation.
https://otaus.com.au/publicassets/8c4f4b4e-5d6b-eb11-a813-000d3ad2e7c8/self-regulation.pdf